Well, What DOES Autism Look Like?

Ask my children, and they'll tell you what it's like to have to hold me back when someone says, "Well, he doesn't look autistic!"  As an autism mom, I feel it is my duty to properly educate this obviously ignorant person about autism, and ask what, exactly, autism is supposed to look to like.  Because apparently, once you've seen one kid with autism, you've seen them all.

I'm quite certain my kids have a ready-go distraction plan in place; Noah throws Avery a look while grabbing my hand and saying, "Let's go," Avery asks the easily distracted Ezra if he wants ice cream or a donut, Ezra starts yelling for one or both, I'm then distracted by the toddler's sudden need for a treat, realize that ice cream really does sound good, and away we go!  They're good, those sneaky kids of mine.

The problem is, this time, I'm the one who got caught up in this.

I watched Avery like a hawk from infancy, going through his  developmental milestones.  I watched him so close, I gave a whole new definition to the name Helicopter Mom.  I ticked things off in my head, I had checklists for him, and by 18 months, I felt we were breathing pretty easy.  I started to relax just a little.

I even remember the day Noah asked me if I thought Avery had autism like he did.  It broke my heart for so many reasons, and Noah's reaction to my answer ("No."), "Good, I don't want him to suffer like I do," absolutely shattered my heart.  Thank you Jesus, we're past that point.

I did continue to watch Avery, and I picked up on ADHD and some anger issues, we had him tested twice, he's been in counseling, but--autism?  It wasn't until the past two months that I've really started looking at him, considering it, and realizing this is the missing puzzle piece.

He's not a difficult child, I was just looking at things all wrong.  Avery, please forgive me.

It didn't look like autism to me.  Because I was comparing him to Noah.

You have to remember that autism is on a scale, that's why it's called a SPECTRUM Difference (we don't use the word 'disorder' in our house).  I forgot that.  I was paying attention, but to the wrong things.  Just because you've seen one kid with autism, doesn't mean you've seen them all.

So, what does autism look like?

Well, in our home, autism looks like this:

Yep, just your average, ordinary, everyday kids.