With a Little Help from My Friends

I recently made the decision to change primary care doctors.  There are a variety of reasons for the necessary change, but I won't get into that.

When I mentioned this to a few of my very good friends, they each sat me down, separately, and said, "While you're there...." and talked to me gently about my worsening depression.

If you've ever had to do that for a friend, you know it's not an easy thing to do.  You don't know how your friend is going to react; the conversation could go one of many ways.

The thing was, I knew they were right.  I needed to do something.  It's not fair to my kids or my husband, and it's not healthy for any of us.  I know I have a strong personal history of depressive and anxiety disorders, but I really wanted to just deny this.  If I ignored it, maybe it would just go away on its own.  Depression doesn't necessarily work that way, especially when it's more of a chemical imbalance rather than situational.

I knew I needed to do something.  I did ask my new doctor about medication, and we decided on one to try.  I've had undesirable side effects from these medications before, which have often made things worse, but I'm comfortable with the decision I made, and I think we found one that meets my needs.  I'm glad my friends had that talk with me, and I'm glad I had that talk with my doctor.  I've been on it for a little over a week, and I'm hopeful that it's already working.  Even though I did lose it in church two weeks ago, I'm not crying at the drop of a hat like I was before.  Words like baby, pregnancy, infertility, and so on, still tend to set me off--so obviously we've gotten to the biggest issue at hand. I am hopeful that it will continue to work this well, and even better, in the coming weeks.

If you have a friend or loved one who you suspect is suffering, please speak up.  Do so with love, and speak life.  Please don't condescend, please don't judge.  Be gentle, and offer support.  Many times, we really don't know how to ask for help, or what kind of support we might need though.  We are so overwhelmed just doing daily tasks, that having to decide to ask for help, or what kind to ask for, is even more mind boggling.

I am blessed by these dear women, and so grateful for them.  I am so lucky to have them in my life, and I love them for taking that risk in talking with me.  They spoke with love, and in doing so, offered hope and life.