Homework, the New Drinking Game

There are times I think raising my children will drive me to drink, and homework is one of those such times.  I'm just going to put this out there--I understand the importance of homework, but I.  HATE.  HOMEWORK.  For those of you who read yesterday's post, homework is one of those moments I will not miss.

I love the sweet little happy notes we get from teachers at the beginning of each school year: "Homework is not busy work!  It is an important part of reinforcing the daily work in the classroom!  It should not take anymore than 15 minutes to complete!"

And you know what?  I agree--for neurotypical kiddos.

But hello?  Have you met my children?  What planet do these teachers come from?  Fifteen minutes?  No.  Not in this house.  Try an hour, hour and a half.

An hour of me begging, pleading, sometimes crying, many times yelling.  JUST.  WRITE.  ONE.  WORD.  PLEASE.

It's stressful for all of us.  Not just for me, not just for the child I'm pleading and bargaining with, but also for the rest of the family.  By the time he gets home from school, his meds have worn off and he's done.  He's held his composure all day, maintained as much self control as he can, and home is where he can let loose.  After almost 7 hours of school, homework is not a priority for him.  Homework is not something I can multitask.  He needs my undivided attention--but so do my other children, dinner prep and anything else I need to be doing.

I have yet to meet a teacher with a practical approach to homework--and I say that as a former teacher, and a person with friends who are teachers.  I do not mean any disrespect to teachers.  For the record, I also have yet to meet a therapist with a practical approach to it.  I've tried everything; trampoline jumps, a break in between each sentence, silly approaches, conversation during the subject, taking outdoor breaks, doing it outside, reward systems, bribing systems (let's be honest--reward systems are bribing systems), pulling my hair out and drinking.  All of those only serve as further distractions.  None of them are solutions.

I'm not suggesting we stop homework.  In fact, I'm shocked at how ill-prepared many of our middle and high schoolers are for a college workload by the lack of homework they have currently.  I'm shocked that my elementary child frequently has more homework than my AP and Honors high schooler.

No, I'm not suggesting an end to homework.  But I might suggest a contribution to a w(h)ine fund.