Living Life to the Fullest

My grandmother died this weekend.  Part of it still doesn't seem real to me, and there's part of me, the all-to-aware-part, that is in avoidance mode.  I am sad, but I am also okay.  My grandmother is finally at peace, a peace she has long deserved.  I am grateful to be able to rest in knowing she is whole again, in both body, mind and spirit.  I serve a God who keeps His promises, so I know she is with Him, and I am grateful for this reassurance I have.  We are blessed to serve a God of hope, of miracles, of love.  I am relieved and grateful she is no longer suffering.  I rejoice for her freedom from this world.

I am grateful she got to meet our boys, and that they have pictures, and memories.  I will always be grateful for the time spent with her.

I learned so much from her.  I went to church with my parents growing up, but it was Nan who taught me to read the bible.  She wasn't a bible-upside-the-head type, she wasn't a lecturer--she led by example.  I saw her reading it, and I wanted to know what was in there. Nan was such an amazing influence in my life, and I will always be grateful for how she loved me, even when I didn't deserve it, even when she didn't quite know what to do with me.  I learned joy from her, laughter, and how to live life to the fullest, no matter one's age.  It wasn't until the past few years she started 'acting' her age.  It was difficult to watch her decline, knowing the amazing, vibrant life she led.  She was a woman balanced well between tough love and compassion.  Nan taught me so many things, just in the way she lived her life.  Enjoy the little things, for they are really the big things.  Leave the big things to God, and let Him work them out.

I used to think a lifetime is too long.  I did not want to live to a ripe old age.  Thinking about it the other night, Shawn and I realized that if we are blessed enough to live as long as Nan did, we have 54 years left here.  ONLY 54 years left.  Only 54 years with each other, our friends, our children, our grandchildren--and if we are blessed as Nan was, our great-grandchildren.

A lifetime is no longer long enough.  A lifetime is too short.  Pack in as much love, as much joy, as much LIFE, as you can.

I don't normally like to mix my faith with other religions, but I found this quote, and it does pertain to this post, so here goes: "Life is a song--sing it.  Life is a game--play it.  Life is a challenge--meet it.  Life is a rearm--realize it.  Life is a sacrifice--offer it.  Life is love--ENJOY it."  --Sai Baba

I love you Nan, I miss you.  Thank you for an amazing life with you.