An Ode to My Legs

I'll let you in on a little secret:  I've never liked my legs.  Nope, not even for 30 seconds in my 40 years.  I've always hated the way they look.  I remember as a child envying the legs of all the other little girls, their long, thin, perfectly tapered-from-knee-to-ankle, athletic looking legs.  I was jealous of their balance, their confidence, their coordination, the graceful way their legs carried them.  When I looked at my own legs, I saw awkwardness and short, stubby elephant trunks.

Unfortunately, I've carried this attitude towards my legs throughout my adult years. It takes me hours of personal pep talks to be able to wear leggings or yoga pants just around my house, and we won't even talk about going out in public in them, or shorts or a short skirt or dress.

Then I got sick, and my legs got worse.  They failed me even worse, to the point I needed a cane, then a walker.  I became so weak, there were some days I could not walk to the end of our driveway.  My legs not only failed me, they failed Noah, and they failed Shawn.  Because of my legs, I failed them.

My legs work a lot better now, thanks to God and medical intervention.  I take medicine everyday, and I take better care of my legs and my body.  There are concessions I make so I have the energy and ability to play and run with my kids and chase my kids (have you seen a toddler run when he has something he isn't supposed to have????).  I run and jump and skip.  I dance break (not break dance, mind you) and am silly and goofy and I embarrass my kids. When challenged to flashlight nerfgun war by teenage boys, my 7 year old, my toddler and my husband, I can yell, "OH YEAH!  BRING IT ON" and charge into the backyard.  I get to participate fully in their lives.  So I don't fail them.

My legs and I have an understanding now.  They do what I need them to do.  They get me where I need to be, and they help me raise my kids.  I don't take them for granted anymore.  I know, because of the nature of my illness, there could be a day they may fail me again.  So, in the meantime, I will   enjoy the use of them.  I'm grateful for my ugly legs.  Because they don't fail me.