We are storers of crap, I'll admit it. Alright alright, I'M the storer of crap. When I don't want to deal with it, I box it up 'for later.' Some of it moved with us from our townhouse to our first home in 2001. Then we just accumulated and accumulated over the years in that home. Stuff was boxed and stored away in one attic, then another attic, then decorated with here and there, then boxed away in this shed and another shed and the garage. When we moved here, I threw some of it away, but still, much of it came with us two years ago to deal with 'later.' Yup. Later. Even though they were the kids' toys I was tripping over, it was my stuff that really needed going through.
We started this morning by moving everything out to the driveway (No, sorry, we're not having a yard sale... No, no I'm not interested in selling that anyway....), and I got to work going through all of our storage boxes. ALL. OF. THEM.
Oh my word, the things I've kept! It always amazes me what I think I can't live without, then end up tossing months or years later.
Over the first eight years of Noah's life, I kept everything. E-V-E-R-Y-T-H-I-N-G. I documented every single second of my only child's life. I found entire bags of baby clothes I had stored away, but really had no specific meaning to me, other than I just wasn't ready to part with anything baby-related at the time. There were Halloween costumes, baby shoes, crib sheets and changing pad covers. I still had all of the cards friends and family sent when he was born, his first birthday cards, and birthday cards from years later. I kept every single worksheet, project, test and paper from preschool forward, all of his VBS projects, and everything he ever created at home. There were all kinds of miscellaneous Noah-related things in those boxes, too, along with daily video recordings from every day for the first year of his life, and other recordings from birthdays, holidays and other special days, and even random days over the next eight years. Again, much of it really had no specific meaning, other than Noah was destined to be an only child, and I just wanted to hold on so very tight to every single moment.
I remember the days of saving things "just in case," then the devastating, tear-filled day I officially gave up after one of my doctors appointments, and donated the bigger items to a residential pregnancy center for teens. I still remember everything about that day, right down to what I was wearing, and how angry and jealous I was with the teenage mothers.
I let go of so much today, physically and emotionally. It was incredibly cathartic. I donated all of the clothes I thought I couldn't ever part with, the Halloween costumes, and even those sweet little baby shoes. I saved two of my favorite maternity shirts, then donated the rest of my maternity clothes. Those things will better serve someone else than they will sitting in a box in my garage (Okay, who wants to remind me of this when I finally get around to going through Ezra's closet????). We saved a few of Noah's cutest projects, and tossed the rest. And on it went.
Today led to a lot of reminiscing, laughter, a lot of tears, and a little bit of laughing so hard I cried. I hugged Noah hard, and I really hugged those two little miracle boys of mine for whom I saved the smaller "just in case" things for. Most of all, today led to a lot of letting go, and best of all, prayers of gratitude for everyone, and everything, I've been gifted. Thank you Jesus, for so much. Thank you for giving me the privilege of being their mama.
I despise the collection of things in my garage. I will have to come and take a nap in your clean garage in order to obtain motivation!!
ReplyDelete