Ripple Effects and Tsunami Waves

A friend recently told me about the ripple effects in her life, which got me thinking about the ones in the lives of the Furr Family of Four, and how those ripple effects have turned into tsunami waves.

Almost two years ago, God moved us to a new church where He grew us closer as a family and began our education.  Noah was easily accepted for the way he was and no one tried to diagnose him (as it always seemed people were trying to do).  We were so relieved to see him finally be free to be himself.  As we grew closer to each other and to God, we became more aware of Noah's differences, which we'd always noticed, but fought and denied.  We were also becoming more open to the people speaking with love to us about these differences as our frustrations grew.  We started talking to the right people and found the right doctor for Noah.


Now, many ripple effects later, we are riding the tsunami waves of an Asperger's Syndrome diagnosis for our oldest child.  It's been an emotional roller coaster, and even though it wasn't much of a surprise, it was still a shock.  Our calendar is full of more testings and evaluations still to be done, as well as occupational therapy appointments and social skills classes to attend.  It seems as though every available surface in the house is filling up with books to read on how to help Noah and our printer is constantly spitting out more information than we can take in.  We're learning a lot.  We're finally learning to accept Noah as God made him and to stop trying to change him.  We're learning he can't help many of the things he does, but with our help and the help of the various doctors and therapists he now sees, Noah could learn to control and curb some of these, substituting them (hopefully!) with more socially acceptable behaviors.  We're learning how to advocate for our children, how to concentrate on the positives and the tidbits of normal that God gives us.  We're learning to laugh more and take more things in stride.  We're learning about perspective and how to change ours instead of demanding that Noah change his.  The biggest thing I've learned so far is that my college education in child psychology, my days working with children with autism and my ABA training mean nothing where Noah is concerned.  And my days as an advocate?  I'll tell you straight up, it's much easier to advocate for someone else's child than it is for your own (parents have these things called EMOTIONS and those aren't smiled upon in the advocate world).  I'm starting over completely in my learning because now I have a specific person to apply it all to.  


Which leads me to another concern...  How do we avoid losing NOAH in all of this and make sure everyone remembers he is a specific person, not a diagnostic code, not a label or a number?  He's my child, with feelings and a personality all his own.  But first and foremost, Noah is God's child, and as the Bible tells us, God made us all in His likeness, even kids with Asperger's.  


I don't know why Noah has Asperger's.  I do know that God has great plans for our boy though, and somehow, this fits into that plan.  


So, here we are, living out in left field, riding the tsunami waves of the ripple effects.