Can We All Just Stop Apologizing???

Well,  unless you really need to, that is.  But that's something you might need to take up with Jesus.

No, seriously.  We need to stop apologizing for infractions we have no control over.  I'm done with it. Next time you apologize to me for something that has nothing to do with you, or some other 'silly' reason, I'm likely to either hug you, or swat your hand.  Can you tell I kind of hit a wall with this today?????

Example A:  A friend really needed to talk, then apologized for taking up too much time (the reality is, she talked for less than 10 minutes, she spoke to the heart of several of us, and sparked an amazing group conversation.).  Ummmm.  Hello?  If you need to talk, you need to talk.  Get it out!  Why are we so worried about taking up each other's time?  Isn't that what friendship is about?  When we meet for coffee, groups, and so on, we are in safe places.  We are there, intentionally, for each other.  One of my biggest pet peeves is when people ask "How are you doing" but don't mean it.  They ask merely because it is the polite thing to do.  I've learned to read the situations and the people who really mean it, and the people who could care less; for the people who could care less, I want to ask why they bother.  Please, if you need time to talk--don't apologize.  Your friends love you dearly.  What you have to say is important.

Example B:  While ordering lunch for myself and Ezra today, the person in front of me became impatient and made a huge point of peeling out of the drive through after placing his order.  When it was my turn at the window, it confused things a little, and the cashier apologized profusely, several times.  Dude, it totally wasn't his fault--it was the impatient guy's fault; he couldn't wait out the two cars ahead of him for a $2 cup of coffee????  I reassured the cashier numerous times, but it didn't seem to help the situation.  It really was completely beyond his control.  There was nothing he could've done about it, yet he continued to apologize.

Even I do it.  I'm tired of hearing the words come out of my mouth.  As if smoothing any kind of situation over will make apologizing better--I'm sorry I took an extra 10 seconds at the check out stand, I'm sorry I laughed when I maybe should have just smiled, I'm sorry my name is Amy, I'm sorry I'm this instead of that, I'm sorry for this and that.... In awkward situations, I even resort to the "I'm sorry I'm just a dumb little woman" routine.  Ugh.  I'll leave the deeper issues and politics out of this...

Society has taught us to apologize, for everything.  We have become so conditioned to just apologize.  Whether it's our fault or not, we must apologize.  No matter the infraction, or the size of it, or the matter of our own personal control over it, we must apologize.  Society insists it is the polite thing to do.  We have to do the back and forth, "I'm so sorry," "Oh goodness, you've got nothing to apologize for" banter.

And I'm just plain tired of it!  I'm over the over-apologizing.  So please, stop apologizing.  You've done nothing wrong.  Instead, I want you to smile, straighten your back, hold your head high, walk with confidence, and remind yourself that I gave you permission to not apologize!