Eating Crow

Before motherhood, and even now, as a mom, I've had many "I'll never"s and "my children will never"s as part of my daily thoughts.  

My children will never act like that!  I'll never feed my little darlings processed character-branded crap!  I'll never park my kids in front of a screen just for five minutes of quiet toilet cleaning by myself!  My kids will never behave that way in public!  I'll never rely on my older children to entertain the younger ones!

I've eaten a lot of crow over the past almost 15 years. A.  Lot.  Of.  Crow.  It's a little chewy, can be bitter, but it's funny to watch the faces of my kids and husband as I gnaw on it.

This summer's biggest crow was "I'll never be the stay at home mom who sends her kid to day camp/care."  Yep, that's exactly what I did.  I found a day camp at a wonderful church up the road and sent Avery there three days a week.

And you know what?  He's loved every bit of it.  He's thrived, he's blossomed, he's grown, he's HAPPY.  Mondays, Wednesdays and Fridays have been his favorite days.  As I've mentioned before, while the rest of us in our family are happy to hide in a corner away from the world, Avery is a people person.  He is an extrovert who needs people.  He needs social interaction.  He would've withered this summer here in the house on his own.  He would've died from absolute boredom while Noah was in Jamaica.  Being home with me while I've needed to concentrate on a needy infant would've left him feeling unimportant.  We don't typically take vacations, so these are Avery's summer adventures.  Watching him bound off after a quick kiss each morning, high-fiving his friends and shouting greetings, I knew I made the right decision for him.  Picking him up each afternoon, listening to him talk endlessly about his exciting day and the many activities Pastor B had for them, I knew I made the right decision.  When he begged for one more week of camp after I had decided against it, siting down time before school begins as my reason, I knew I was making the right decision as I wrote out that last check for that final week, caving.  Avery doesn't need down time so much as he needs people and interaction time. 

So, I sent my kid to day camp/care.  I also found countless VBSs for him.  We threw ourselves into the free activities provided by the library.  He's loved it, and I'm quite certain he already knows just about everyone in our new county! We can't go anywhere around here without him waving and calling out to someone he's met through one of these activities!  Avery will have familiar faces at his new school, and hopefully, even a few in his classroom.  

My prayer, years from now, is that Avery will understand that I recognized, and met, his needs.  My prayer is that he will not look back and think, "Mom just wanted to be rid of me."  Instead, I want him to know that I love him enough to give him room, and an environment to grow, where he can be himself.

Some people eat cake.  Me?  I eat crow.  And every now and then, I enjoy it.