Some days I just can't handle it. Some days I just want to be free of it. Some days, like today, as I mourn the loss of my grandfather, I don't want my world to be black and white. Some days, it's just too much. Some days I think, "Not today, please, just not today. Whatever Aspergerian curveballs and monkey wrenches life has in store for me, please, just not today." Some days, like today, when my body hurts so much that I just want to lay in bed and not even try to move, I don't want to deal with it.
Some days, like today, I want to wake up and hear a voice say, "Congratulations! Today, your world will be free of Asperger's and Sensory Perception Disorder. Today is a free day. Do with it what you wish and what you need."
It sounds like an awful thing to say as a mom. I love my son more than life itself and I wouldn't change him--or anything that makes him who he is--but sometimes, I just need a break. I just need one Asperger-free day.
That's all. Thank you for listening.
If it's like this for me, what is it like for Noah?
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